Thursday, March 19, 2009

Flares

Flares are a major part of what we deal with when it comes to having Fibromyalgia. They can last anywhere from one day to months depending on what we do, eat, or sometimes our body reacts to the change in temperature.

Most people look forward to the season change, and I admit that I used to too, but since being diagnosed, I look at them with a bit of dread sometimes too. You see, my flares tend to worsen when the temperatures are warm in the day and really cold at night. Twenty degree changes reek havoc on my joints and can make me very tired. There are days when I just want my favorite pair of sweat pants, sweat shirt, turtle neck, and robe, and that's about it. But sometimes, you can't stay in bed. Sometimes you have important things to do like a parent-teacher conference, or you need to go to work.

So how can one feel fabulous on days like these? It's not easy-- I can tell you that much. But there are a few things that get me by on the bad days. One is my kids. The power of love is a strong thing and can be the best medicine around.

My oldest, who is eight, has seen me go through a lot with this beast. There were times that I literally couldn't get up from the couch after an eight hour day of work. But I never wanted to disappoint her when she asked me to play go fish or even run the water for her bath. We would make a game out of getting Mommy up. I'd have her try and pull me up from the couch when she was about 4. I would eventually get up with her help. It was fun for her and yet, it gave me some time to alert my body that it was time to move.

When I had my youngest, who just turned 14 months, was born, we considered her our miracle child. We had her, after we found out I had gotten a handle on my Fibro and knew what my limitations would be. Round the clock feedings were not a picnic, but she kept me going with each smile. The serotonine from breast feeding her helped, as well.

My husband keeps me going too by lending a hand when (or where) I need it. There are days that I just don't know what I'd do without him.

We all have days when the phone rings and we may not want to talk to that person on the other end of the phone. Sometimes they just don't get how tired or achy we may be feeling, but sometimes it can be us that makes the mistake of shutting them out.

I know I've done it. I had a friend who thought I could cure myself if I'd take certain supplements or go on a certain diet. She would come over and get this twinkle in her eye and take me to places to find a cure.
I knew I was in trouble, so some days I just wouldn't answer the phone.

Now, thinking back, maybe I should have, because even though she really didn't understand the research of this disease, she understood that her friend needed her around. This is of course, is another great form of medicine, whether we want to admit it to ourselves or not.

I can take my flares for granted sometimes. I see them as me being me and I get alone in my zone of feeling bad. But when somebody rolls down their window at school drop off to make sure I'm okay, or a clerk at a grocery store stops me and asks if I need help getting my groceries in my car, I take notice. I take notice, give thanks to the person at hand, and then at that point realize that my flare isn't as bad as I thought. It's not as bad because I am realizing at that moment that people really do care-- no matter how big or how small it may be at the time it is assumed.

Take thought in the little things when you can, it may help with your flares. And don't forget about my contest! The 25th commenter will get a free copy of one of my books. That number is coming up soon!

Stay Fabulous!
Love and friendship,

Kimberley
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